Ralph Digby, the incredible Elongated Man looked back into the
bathroom. He turned back around to see if anyone was around, then
looked again.
Sure enough, the black hole was still there, just a blank circle
dangling in space a foot or so over the toilet.
"Honey?" he called out, hoping that Sue could hear him.
No response.
He thought about using the comlink on his wrist, then decided
against it. The less people that knew that there was something
wrong in his bathroom the less jokes he would have to put up with
when it was all over. Better to find a way not to let Beetle or
Booster Gold know anything about it than to raise a general alarm
that would be sure to bring them. After all, checking his mental
schedule, one or the other of them was supposed to be on monitor
duty. Which meant whichever one didn't have to be there was most
likely there anyway.
He stretched his torso back through the living quarters. Sure
enough, Sue wasn't there.
The Cat stopped dead and cocked his head in alarm. Just as suddenly,
he brought his right paw to his face and began licking. After
all, he had planned to stop and lick his paw. His stop had nothing
at all to do with confusion, merely part of the greater plan.
Ralph supressed a chuckle. To his own amazement, he had been just
as startled. After all, since inheriting him from Power Girl,
the feline disaster known in League circles as "The Cat"
or sometimes "That Darn Cat" mostly kept to himself.
Every once in awhile though, the Cat reminded people that he was
still around by popping his head back in from whatever pit he'd
found to flop down in for a bit.
Ralph continued to stretch toward the door, opened it and then
stretched into the hallway beyond. It was one of the advantages
of having silly putty for a body. One of the many, he reminded
himself, trying hard not to get too large of a smile on his face.
Buddy Baker was sitting in his room watching television when he
saw Ralph's torso rush pass. He stared for a moment, looked back
at the television, glanced back toward the extended body dangling
in front of his door, walked over and closed his door. He went
back to his chair and sat down, shaking his head. No matter how
long he stayed, no matter how much he had experienced as a hero,
there were still somethings that he would never get used to. Having
a teammate stretched out like a rubberband along the hallways
was one of them he decided. He glanced back at the door as if
daring for another something to make his list, then quickly fixed
his gaze back on the television. After all, when you were hanging
around a group like this, tempting fate was never a good idea.
Beatrice Da Costa smiled at the screen in front of her. "<So,
you're interested?>*"
(* Translated from Spanish - GD)
The masked face of the man known as El Diablo smiled back at her.
"<I admit, it's tempting. I was very flattered to be considered
for League membership the last time you asked. But I was far too
busy. These days however things have calmed down quite a bit.
The Vigilante coming out of retirement a few months back has really
helped me cut down on street crime. There's really no reason why
I shouldn't be able to extend my activities, for a while at least.>"
Beatrice beamed. "<I look forward to seeing you.>"
she said,trying hard not to sound too desperate. But it *was*
good to be able to relate to someone, even if it was just by sharing
a common language. Besides, he *was* awfully cute.
He returned her smile with a nod. "<It should be fun.>"
he said and signed off.
She sighed and sank into her chair. It had gone much easier than
she had expected. She'd asked, he'd said "yes". Now
all she had to do is to let everyone know there was a new member
coming.
The Signal almost ran into the Elongated Man as he walked out
of his room. Or, more to the point, he almost walked into the
piece of Ralph Digby that was stretched across his path. He looked
down the hall, one long purple strand going all the way down.
He turned and looked the other way to see the same thing, one
long "EM" on a purple jumpsuit.
It would be so easy, he realized, to take out the Elongated Man
when he was so vulnerable. Maybe a pair of tough giant scissors,
or some sort of electro-pulse weapon. It would be fairly easy
to take him out, and with him down...with him down then everyone
would know that the Signal Man had returned to his evil ways.
He sighed and shook his head, ducking under the strand blocking
his path and going to the vending machine down the hall. He couldn't
risk exposing himself, not yet. Things were too close to completion
- there was too much to ruin for a mere chance to take out the
Elongated Man. Once his plans came to fruitation, they all would
end up falling at his hand. Until then, he merely had to bide
his time.
"Honey?"
Skeets heard the voice of Ralph Digby as he had gone out, apparently
searching for his wife. Skeets had wanted to break cover to let
him know that she had stepped out for a bit, and had in fact left
a note to that fact for him on the night table he had apparently
forgotten to check when he had gotten up that morning. He wanted
to - but he knew that he couldn't. Not if he wanted to keep his
surveilance on Signal Man. Letting someone else know that he was
indeed present risked exposing himself, so to speak. After all,
he was just a little flying piece of metal... he sighed at that
thought,or the nearest equivalent, he had been with Booster far
too long.
But when he considered that he had also observed the departure
under the cover of darkness of someone's pet, the one they called
Gnort* and had not yet reported it to anyone, he felt justified
in not breaking cover this time.
(* Last issue - GD)
He continued to wait and whirl. When The Signal...Signal Man...Skeets
wished that someone would decide what to call the guy once and
for all... came out of his room Skeets thought he would have to
sound the alarm. After all, there was a gleam in his eye, like
he wanted to do something to the bit of Digby that was blocking
his path. Skeets watched him toss the question into the air and
then shoot it down with precision before walking down the hall.
Skeet would have felt better about the whole thing if it hadn't
been for his own analogy - after all, the action he was describing
was often called "skeet shooting". Not a good omen.
Not at all.
"Hey Ralph!" Ted "Blue Beetle" Kord called
out to the passing Elongated Man.
"I'll talk to you later!" Ralph said, and then continued
on his way.
It wasn't until a few moments later that Ted realized exactly
how far Ralph was stretching himself. He shrugged and got back
to business.
Booster was still talking to Ray Palmer, the Atom who was resting
in the command chair. Beetle tried hard not to smile. After all,
the circumstances of the Atom's visit weren't the best. Apparently
he had been attacked while guarding something that shouldn't fall
into the wrong hands. From what he had told them, it had*. But
still, The Atom was a well respected Leaguer from the old days.
Granted, so was Ralph - but Ralph was...well, Ralph was Ralph.
The Atom though - the Atom was the type of guy who would make
people think twice about dismissing the team as "Justice
League Lite". Of course, he reminded himself, the Atom only
had come to them when he couldn't reach the League.
(* Last issue - GD)
Beetle chose not to dwell on it though. Maybe it was an act of
fate, placing the Atom on a collision path with Extreme Justice.
Maybe it would work out...maybe it would be one of those things
you thought about in retrospect the start of something..."
"...horrible" Ray said, breaking Beetle's train of thought.
"Beg pardon?"
Booster tried hard not to chuckle. He failed miserably. Ray tried
hard to hold it against him, he couldn't.
"I see you're paying attention as usual. Mr. Palmer here..."
"Ray" The Atom interjected.
"Ray here" Booster continued, "Was just telling
me how bad the situation is."
"World shaking stuff?"
Booster shook his head, " Apparently someone got the bright
idea of putting some sort of energy..."
"A being from the 5th dimension" Ray interrupted.
"Yeah, a being from the 5th dimension" Booster continued,
"in a vial. Then they got the bright idea of bringing it
to Detriot."
"No one thought anyone would bother looking here...after
all - it's Detriot. I tried to tell them that the League used
to be based here and that there was still quite a bit of attention
focused on the area by some unsavory elements. But no one ever
listens to me after all, so I agreed to stay on as security."
No one stated the obvious.
"Who's baby is this anyway?" Beetle asked. "You
keep saying THEY - but you haven't mentioned a name."
Ray sighed, "I guess if you're going to help me retrieve
it, you should know what we're doing. I'm assisting the DEO.*"
(* The government agency specializing in monitoring the superhuman
community. - GD)
"Are they sending anyone out to help us find this thing?"
Beetle asked.
Ray laughed and poked Booster in the ribs. Booster was almost
doubled over with laughter.
"What?!?!" Beetle demanded.
Booster wiped his eyes. "You haven't done any work for a
government agency before have you?"
Beetle shook his head.
"They're denying everything." Ray finished as one with
Booster, before continuing, "Officially speaking, we're on
our own."
"We?" Beetle asked hopefully.
Ray smiled and nodded. Booster looked a little too smug. Ted made
a mental note to find out what had happened when he hadn't been
paying attention.
"For now at least." The Atom replied.
The man known as the Blue Beetle tried hard to keep his composure
when he shook the man's hand. He didn't completely fail. At least
that was a start.
The space faring herald of fashion known throughout the universe
as the Scarlet Skier sat up in bed. It was a tentative sitting
up. He still felt sore, but at least he was still alive. At least
he had delivered his message, his warning. At least he thought
he had.
He put a foot on the floor, then the other. He placed a bit of
weight on them. It hurt a bit - but he had to go talk to the one
they called Gnort. He had to tell him something face to face.
Something he hadn't wanted to tell anyone else. Something personal.
If it wasn't too late.
He put his full weight on the floor, feeling his legs buckle a
bit. He leaned against the bed. Pushing himself off he started
to walk. He didn't fall. At least there was that. But it was all
he could do to keep upright. He grabbed onto the doorframe to
keep himself upright - then made his way down the hall holding
onto some sort of purple handrail that someone had installed to
dangle in the middle of the hall.
The Scarlet Skier shook his head in disbelief. Maybe it was some
sort of human custom he figured, although he couldn't see what
use it would do to most humans. Of course, he decided after a
few steps, perhaps they had installed it for his use when he got
back to his feet. It was certainly helpful he added mentally,
the humans were truly a thoughtful race. He hoped they wouldn't
end up being wiped out.
Gnort scouted the area. Empty space - empty space - pieces of
someone's space station - communications satellite - glowing yellow
figure incoming - a piece of rocket - empty space - a... he stopped
and re-took inventory. He looked back to the satelitte for a moment
before realizing he had gone too far. He looked up just as the
yellow beam hit him. Gnort felt the impact knock him several feet
back.
"Ouch" he muttered, using his ring to stop himself from
drifting too far.
Gnort looked back and saw a rather handsome fellow wearing a yellow
ring. He was one furry ring wielding babe magnet, Gnort concluded
before realizing that his attacker was an exact match for himself.
Right down to the mole on his left...although he couldn't see
it he was sure after a few moments. The only real difference Gnort
noted, other than the fact that he wore a yellow ring instead
of green and was clearly evil, was that his attacker was also
not AS cute as he was. But then again, Gnort told himself, that
would be asking a bit much.
"I am the Anti-Gnort!" his attacker declared, "Prepare
to die!"
Gnort cocked his head to one side in confusion. After a moment,
he responded. "I am Gnort" he declared, "Prepare
to...um...live?"
The Roach placed the vial on the desk. A suitcase was already
in place next to it.
"As ordered" The Roach said as he put the vial down.
He wasn't exactly sure what was in it - only that there were people
willing to pay big money to get it. That more often than not was
worth the risk.
The man smiled and nodded. He picked up the vial and examined
it. The stopper was still firmly in place.
"I have another task for you" the man, whose face was
hidden in the darkness,said "If you want to double your money".
The Roach didn't miss a beat. Jobs that paid so much for so little
were often more dangerous than they at first seemed. But after
all, he was the Roach - nothing could take him out. There were
advantages to having the attributes of the land based bottom feeders.
"Name it" he replied.
"I need you to go to this address" he said, pushing
forward a piece of paper, " and keep the occupants busy for
a while."
"Who are the occupants?" The Roach asked, leaning forward.
The man took a step backward, further into the darkness. "They
call themselves Extreme Justice."
The Roach laughed. "Not a problem." he said, picking
up what he hoped would be the first of his new briefcase full
of money collection.
The man watched as the Roach left. Then he settled back into his
chair, holding the vial up to the light. This would be his greatest
truimph yet. He pushed a button on his desk and the back of the
room lit up with monitors. He watched as the Anti-Gnort engaged
his counterpart.
The man sighed. He had hoped to distract more of the world's superheroes
away with that ploy. But one less Green Lantern paying attention
wasn't bad.
He felt himself about to cackle over his fiendish plan. But then
he stopped himself. After all - he wasn't ready to reveal himself.
Not yet anyway.
The Cat wondered when the rest of the stretchy-guy would come
back. Actually he didn't. But he glanced over once or twice just
to keep an eye on things. His good one.
It wasn't until he started hearing noises coming out of the bathroom
that he started to get concerned. He crept across the floor, wishing
that he had some high weeds, but knowing in his heart that he
was still doing more than good enough to avoid detection.
The Scarlet Skier cocked his head in confusion as he watched a
strange creature crawl across the middle of the floor from the
doorway. He had followed the handrailing back to this place, which
he had assumed was where he was supposed to go. "Hello"
he said to the creature. It made no sign of having heard him.
"Hello there" the strange creature at the door repeated.
The Cat kept his eye focused forward, at the strange noise coming
from the bathroom - but made a note of the new creature at the
door. He stopped at the edge of the bathroom, hiding between the
feet of Ralph Digby, still fixed firmly at the edge of the bathroom
as if trying to block anything from coming out.
The Cat stopped and looked. He cocked his head, then quickly started
licking his paw. He looked again between licks, sure enough someone
was still there.
Sue Digby came in a side entrance, hoping to surprise Ralph. She'd
spent the last few months distracting him from finding out that
his favorite mystery writer was coming out with a new book. It
hadn't been easy - but now that she had that book in her hands,
signed to "Ralph Digby: My favorite hero" by the author
herself, it had all been worth it. Or rather it would be when
she handed the book to Ralph, complete with an invitation to a
private party the publisher would be throwing the following week.
She tried to picture his expression - she might even be able to
catch him speechless. Yes, it would all be worth it once she saw
his face...
But all she was seeing was his torso, stretched out across the
hallway. She reached out and gave it a tug, followed by tapping
out shave and a haircut, their signal. Not very original, but
Sue knew anything more would have just confused him.
It wasn't long before Ralph was recoiling back toward her, him
head turned 180 degrees to face her. "Sue! Thank god! I was
running out of places to look!"
"What's going on?"
"There's a..."
"Hey Ralph - there you are! Or rather, there's your head!"
Beetle's voice echoed through the hall. "We've got a situation."
"I know." Ralph replied as he pulled his feet back to
his current location to join the rest of his body in the hall.
"I was about to brief Sue. How did you find out anyway?"
Beetle pointed back to the command center, "The Atom told
us."
"The Atom?" Ralph exclaimed, "How did he find out
what was going on in my..."
"Excuse me guys..." Beatrice interrupted, "But
I think there's something you should know..."
"We know" Beetle and Ralph said as one.
"But I don't." Sue reprimanded. "Would someone
please tell me what exactly is going on here."
"Maybe I can explain things..." The Atom said, as he
stepped out of the command center with Booster in tow. "You
see..."
"There's sort sort of gentleman in the next room who's quite
rude" a voice interrupted from the direction of the Digby's
room.
Everyone turned as one to see a naked Scarlet Skier emerge.
"My god!" Ralph explained as Sue and Beatrice snickered.
Ted and Michael weren't far behind. "Why are you out of bed?
Why are you naked? Why..."
"...is there someone in our room?" Sue finished, half
a step ahead of the rest toward the room.
She caught sight of the Cat in watching something in the bathroom
out of the corner of her eye. Whatever it was - it was in there.
Booster Gold put his hand on her shoulder as he activated his
force shield. "Let me go in first" he said as he stepped
forward.
He walked to the bathroom doorjam and stopped. He looked, turned
back to the group with a confused look on his face then looked
back again to make sure he had seen it right. Sure enough, it
was still there. Grinning at him.
"Is the blackhole still there?" Ralph asked, pushing
forward.
Booster turned back to them and shook his head, "Um...I'd
have to say no."
"What is it then?" Sue asked, not sure why her husband
would think there was a blackhole in the bathroom, but open to
just about anything at that point.
"Um..." Booster started, but then stopped, looking back
over his shoulder to make sure it was still there.
"What is it?" Beetle asked, pushing passed the others
to get a look of his own. He stopped and stared. Then he looked
back at the others, turning quickly back to the scene in amazement
to make sure it was still there.
"Would someone please tell me what's going on?" The
Signal said, coming in behind the others.
"There's someone in the bathroom" Beatrice said matter-of-factly.
"So what?" The Signal said in the same tone. "What's
the matter with you people? Can't anyone go in peace?"
"It's not that..." Beatrice started, "It's..."
"Solomon Grundy" Beetle blurted out.
"WHAT!" the group said as one.
"What is he doing in there?" The Atom asked, the first
to regain his composure.
"Reading the paper." a husky voice came from out of
the bathroom.
Booster and Beetle stared at each other for a moment before they
both grabbed for the door and firmly closed it.
NEXT ISSUE: Ok, we've got Solomon Grundy
in the bathroom, the Roach about to attack, a battle between Gnort
and Anti-Gnort, a mystery villain, black holes, new members...and
oh yeah one of the biggest announcements you're likely to hear
anytime soon. All in the next issue! Neil Gow says , "Don't
be a schmuck - read it!" Ok, well he didn't actually say
that - but he MIGHT have!
