issue #1(of 4)

By Gary Dreslinski

(Note: This story takes place shortly after the events in the Extreme Justice story in Showcase #2 , by Barry Reese, who in fact created this team. Props to the Reese man. Much love. Insert your outdated "street" slang here.)

---

Deep within the former Detroit headquarters of the Justice League of
America, the Signal sits waiting for ... some sort of sign thingee ...
to act. "I've played my hand well...they suspect NOTHING. Not even
when I single handedly stopped the evil of Dr. Fear. They have no idea
what I am capable of, but soon...oh yes soon they SHALL!" and with an
evil-light cackle, he gets back to his feet, brushes off his butt, and
slinks back into the darkness to wait.

---

"Hey Booster? Have you seen the Signal?"
"Yeah Ted...I thought I saw him slinking off into the darkness a few
minutes ago."
"Oh - ok. Just keep an eye on him ok?"
"Already done. Got just the guy for the job."

---

WHIRL
WHIRL
TWEEP
WHIRL
In the darkness he watches as The Signal, wondering when or if Booster
planned on giving his gears some more oil. He'd been in moth balls up
until recently, just sitting on the shelf, unnoticed by
anyone...unloved by all...and certainly not asked to be part of any of
the annual events that always seemed to be popping up. No team-ups for
him. But that was just fine. For now he was keeping an eye on the
mysterious The Signal, but soon the world would know that Skeets was
back, and he wasn't happy.

---

"So...tell me again how we beat Dr. Fear and his assassins of joy?"
"For the last time Gnort...they never called themselves the assassins
of joy!"
"They should have...it's a good name."
"I'm sure it is."
Gnort tried to reach for a pencil on the end table but ended up
knocking it to the floor.
"Could you get that for me?" he asked innocently.
The lovely Latina known as Fire shook her head, "I'm NOT falling for
that one AGAIN, doggie-boy."
"You sure?" he pleaded, his face going all puppy-eyed.
Fire sighed, "Ok - just this once."
As she bends down, Gnort smiled. Sometimes life was good.

---

"I'm still not sure exactly what exactly happened Ralph ...could you
explain it one more time?"
"Of course dear," Ralph Digby, the world famous Elongated Man said as
he stretched his head out of the bathroom and into the bedroom to talk
to his ever lovely wife Sue. "Dr. Fear hired Fastball and Bolt to
steal the Silver Dome, home of the Detroit Lions, so they came here..."
"Wait a minute..."
"Yes?"
"The Silver Dome isn't IN Detroit, it's over in Pontiac."
Ralph smiled, "Exactly...once they figured that one out, they just
started creating random havoc, mostly on each other."
"And so you guys were called in..."
"Not exactly."
"Not exactly?"
"We sort of stumbled on it on the way to the store to pick up some
supplies, or rather Booster did, and he called in the rest of us..."
"Who then beat up the bad guys?"
"Not exactly."
"Not exactly?"
"Actually we showed up, started getting our collective butts kicked
until the Signal, who was acting all mysterious, just walks up and
blinds them all with a bright light..."
"He takes them out with a BRIGHT LIGHT!!!????"
"Well...to his credit, it's pretty darn bright...then as soon as they
got their sight back he was there to hypnotize them into thinking it
was a good idea to just give up."
"And they did?"
"Yep."
Sue sighed, "Are you almost done in there?"
Ralph scrunched up his face, then relaxed it, "Yeah" he said, his nose
twitching, "but you might want to bring some air freshener cause I
smell something...and it certainly isn't a mystery."

---

Above the trademarked skies of Manhattan, which we'll just go ahead
and call "New York City" since that's what people mean to say when
they talk about stuff in "NYC" anyway...soars a man of the stars,
garbed in dark red armor and strapped into his cosmic skies. He soars
as high as he can, pounding again and again against the barrier placed
there by his former master. Never more could was he to explore the
galaxy, finding new and interesting planets to be redecorated...he was
cursed forever more to live his life on the Earth. He had defied his
master and now the stars were denied him. He was the Scarlet Skier and
he was about to burst into a soliloquy.
"Banished...forced into exile from my home - the stars...never more to
feel the space wind rush through my non existent hair...never more to
know the love of an alien woman, or the smile of the alien child of
the alien woman, not to mention having to pay the child support to the
alien woman FOR the alien child. My home though, my home is in the
stars, and that is where my heart is, for it is truly my home. And one
day I shall break free of these bounds and soar into the heavens, out
among the stars, which, if I haven't mentioned yet, are my home, and
on that day I shall be glad. But until then, I shall join with a group
of four adventurers living in this mortal city, hang out with them,
defeat some of their foes, and yet never really be part of them...for
my home is not with them, but in the stars..." He peers out toward the
stars again, then stops. He thunks himself on the head, reminding
himself that he's not actually in exile, nor is there any sort of
barrier keeping him on Earth.
He soars up to through the atmosphere and returns to the stars...

---

Later, back in Detroit

"Hey Ted...guess what...whatcha doing?"
"What does it LOOK like I'm doing?"
"Let's see...bending over some sort of gadget thing with a blowtorch."
"It's called INVENTING - I'm an inventor, that's what I do."
"Hate to tell you man, but it doesn't survive."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm a time traveler remember? I've been to the Ted Kord
museum...whatever that thing is isn't in there."
"Since when did you get so...TED KORD MUSEUM!!!!! You've never told me
about that before!"
"Must have slipped my mind. Either that, or I just thought that
knowing would somehow affect the time stream. Watch your fingers."
"I AM watching my fingers...so why mention it now...ouch...that
hurt...wouldn't that affect the time stream too?"
"Sure...without a doubt."
Ted turned off the blowtorch and looked at him, exasperated. "So why'd
you tell me?"
Booster shrugged, "It was funny."
Ted looked down at his gadget, and back up at Booster, "It was funny?
It was FREAKING funny! You risked the stability of the time stream for
a JOKE!" Ted picked up his gadget and threw it at Booster, who
switched on his force field. The gadget smashed against it, shattering
it into hundreds of tiny pieces.
"See" Booster said, with a big grin, "It didn't survive. Wasn't in the
museum at all...come to think of it, it wasn't even the Ted Kord
museum that I was thinking of - must have been the Ted KNIGHT
museum..yeah, that's the one..."
"I'm gonna...."
"Have to catch me first!" Booster yells, then takes off down the hall
with the Blue Beetle chasing after him.
"Gang way!" Booster shouts, "NOW Gnort!"
When Beetle comes around the corner, he has to stop short. In the
center of the room is a large cake with the words "Happy Birthday
Ted", topped by way too many green candles, burning green flame. Ralph
and Booster give him slaps on the back while he gets a kiss on each
cheek by Beatrice and Sue respectively. Gnort comes over to shake his
hand, but Booster quickly steps in between, citing the fact that no
one, including Gnort knew where that hand had been. The Signal sat
over in the corner, looking mysterious and wondering when he was going
to get some cake.
"You thought I'd forgot didn't you?" Booster said as he escorted Ted
over to the cake.
"Frankly *I* forgot...we've just been so busy lately that I didn't
think that anyone else would even think to..."
"You're my best friend man." he says putting his arm around Ted,"I'd
never forget ...not with the chance to rub your nose in the fact that
you're another year older."
"I appreciate that Boos...Michael, I really do and...HEY!" he makes a
jab at Booster's side and they both fall down laughing.
"Are you two going to be down there all day or is someone going to
blow out these darn candles so we can have some cake?"
Booster and Beetle look up at the impatient Gnort and burst into peels
of hysterical laughter again. Finally, they compose themselves enough
to get up and go over to the cake. Everyone gathers around singing
"Happy Birthday to Beetle" as well as his misspelled namesake's
"Birthday" song. Finally, Booster leans over to Ralph, "Ok...light
them for real now."
The green flames disappear on Fire's, command and Ralph sets a more
appropriate, although just as painful, number of candles alight.
"Make a wish" Sue says, just as Ted closes his eyes and blows.

Suddenly a scarlet clad figure comes crashing through the layers of
protection usually offered by the Compound ceiling, landing directly
on the cake.
The team quickly runs over to see who it is.
"Isn't that the Scarlet Skier?" Sue offers.
"Sure smells like him," Gnort says, after sniffing him for a second.
A scarlet clad hand reaches up and grabs him by the lapel. "It's
coming...I couldn't stop it...it's coming..."
"Who?" Ted asks, "WHO'S coming?"
"The Assassins of Joy?" Gnort asks hopefully.
"NO" the Scarlet Skier manages to bellow before passing out," it's
coming HERE... it's coming for YOU Gnort - it's coming for YOU!"
Ted and Booster exchange looks as Gnort looks around, bewildered.
"Just so you know Booster..."
"Yeah?"
"This is NOT what I wished for."

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Next: It comes for Gnort. What is it? Why is it coming for Gnort?
There's only one way to find out, come back for the next exciting issue!